Yesterday, I had a long conversation with my very distant friend on the phone. We discussed how God works in his mysterious ways. See, I was confused. I’ve never gotten any signs from him of what to do, but what my friend said, actually worked.

Maybe things are mean to be this way. Maybe they aren’t. Who knows? Time will tell. As far as the choosing a path goes, I am currently undecided.

I tried reasoning with them, it didn’t work. If only they knew they were going to get hurt in the end. I wish them the best of luck.

If only.


Today, nothing too special is happening. I used to use this blog for my photos a while ago, but that changed today.

My life today, is boring. There is nothing to do, nothing to see.

Babysitting=my day. “I’m getting paper.” -Lil Wayne. Lolololol. I used to take my life for granted. But now I don’t.

The only thing I remember over the past few months, is a numbness in the back of my mind.

I haven’t felt anything for a while now, but that all changed. Gladly, I welcomed it in. Now I know what it’s like to be truly happy. I find that humorous, because I used to never know what happy was since I was like, I don’t know, 12? But yeah.

I guess you can learn a lot from your friends. They taught me how to let down my walls and let people in. I’m finding it isn’t easy to learn to trust people, but I’ve found those of whom I trust.

I just wish, you’d realize how I felt. And maybe feel the same too. Hm.

Love is a strange word. It takes you up these roads. You have to make choices, and sometimes those choices are hard to make. I’m finding that out the hard way. One road is equal to happiness. The other may equal some happiness, but being miserable as well. Maybe I find it different from other people, that love is as easy as breathing. But from what I’ve found, love is hard. Really. Freaking. Hard.

Maybe if someone would show me a sign, it’d help. Some things are hard to discriminate from others.

It makes me wonder…


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